I took the photos (with perhaps one or two exceptions) with the Canon EOS 7D. I did the editing with Pinnacle Studio 14 Ultimate, aided by Image Cropper – a nice shareware utility for cropping 4:3 images to 16:9 size. This was a good introduction to video editing. The number of decisions involved was nearly overwhelming, and I could easily have spent the rest of the year tweaking and improving it. But you’ve got to stop somewhere.

I hope you enjoy it and that it makes you want to visit these wonderful parks.

I’m still teaching myself how to shoot and edit video. Right now I’m working on what sounds like a fairly simple project: a slide show of photos I took on my recent vacation to Utah and Arizona. What’s complicating the project is that I want the final output to be in true HD quality. The good news is that my camera takes wonderful photos, and my video editing software can handle the HD format. The bad news is that HD format uses a 16:9 aspect ratio (1920 x 1080), and my camera takes photos in 3:2 (5184 x 3456). The 16:9 ratio is significantly wider than it is high (for landscapes), so to get my 3:2 photo in full frame I have to lose quite a bit off the top or bottom or both.

One option would be to simply crop from the center, taking out an equal amount from the top and bottom. I was planning to do that until I realized how serious the consequences of this non-decision can be. Take a look at the following photo from Zion National Park. The first is the original, in 3:2 ratio (I’ve resized it to 20% for presentation on the web).

Now take a look at the same image, cropped from the center to a 16:9 ratio.

It’s nice, but the canyon walls on the right look like they’re fighting to get out of the frame. They feel oppressed somehow.

Here’s another take, leaving in as much sky as possible at the top.

Now the mountains have room to breathe, but I’ve lost too much foreground. The sense of three-dimensionality is gone.

I can bring back the bottom of the photo, but …

Now my eye is drawn to the tree/shrub that’s front and center, with the canyon serving merely as backdrop.

I don’t know what the right answer is. I doubt there is one. Going through this exercise has taught me a lot about composition and editing. I never realized that every photograph contained so many boxes of cereal.

How would you have cropped the photo? Why? And how long would it have taken you to make a decision?

I’m going to call my new venture Figmond Entertaiment. “Entertainment” because it gives me more latitude than “Films” or “Productions,” and “Figmond” because that was my nickname in elementary school and I’m fairly confident that no other production company is already called that.

Once I’d decided I wanted to make movies I considered getting started by taking classes at places like Emerson or CDIA. But I decided I wasn’t ready for that kind of commitment. So I put my Googling skills to work to find resources for teaching myself. It didn’t take too long to find a gold mine: MicroFilmmaker Magazine. I’ve really just started exploring the contents of that site. One of the first places I went to were the reviews. Based on their strong recommendation, I went to Amazon and bought $30 Film School. While shopping, I also picked up The Power Filmmaking Kit: Make Your Professional Movie on a Next-to-Nothing Budget and Digital Filmmaking.

I looked through the first two books to see what kinds of things I would need to buy in order to produce something that I and other people might actually want to see. (I knew I could theoretically make “a movie” using my digital point-and-shoot camera and Windows Live Movie Maker, but I also knew that no matter how good the content of a movie made that way, it would look and sound so bad that I’d get frustrated and disheartened.) I concluded that the minimum outfit included the following:

• A camera that could record HD video in a variety of formats, including 24 frames per second
• A good microphone
• A decent non-linear editing software package
• A tripod

And that’s pretty much it. I’ll probably soon decide that I’ll also need some lights, but these should get me started.

After reading some reviews, at first I was tempted to go with a pretty high-end camera, like the Panasonic Pro AG-HVX200A or the Sony PMW-EX3 . But while I was looking at some HD camcorder demonstrations on YouTube I saw a lot of people talking about something that looked a lot more appropriate for a newbie: the Canon EOS 7D. It costs thousands less than the full-size camcorders but the image quality looks spectacular. The only serious drawbacks in terms of video recording seem to be a 12-minute-per-shot limit and the inability to steady it on a shoulder while shooting. Neither of those were deal-breakers for me, so I ordered it.

Based on a review of the EOS 7D on YouTube (unfortunately, I can’t find the clip again right now), I also ordered a good quality audio recorder, the Zoom H4n. This should allow me to capture much cleaner dialogue than I’d be able to get from the camera’s built-in microphone alone.

I haven’t settled on my software package yet. I downloaded a trial of Adobe Creative Suite 4 Production Premium, but it was far too complicated to get started with. I’m trialing the scaled-down Adobe Premiere Elements 8, but I’ve seen a number of complaints about sluggish performance. I’ve ordered an upgraded video card for my computer, so I’ll have to see how well Premiere Elements 8 does once that’s installed. Another option is Pinnacle Studio, but its reviews are also less than stellar.

Total investment so far: about $3,000.00. I’ll continue to log my adventures as a movie mogul after the stuff arrives in the mail.

The “other version” of the Hitler-Coakley-Brown video has now received well over a million views. But not only on DrRonPaul2012’s page. The same video has been uploaded to YouTube by:

• Battlefield315 (67,000 views as of Friday afternoon)
• RonPaul4Pres2K8 (4,200)
• tikamue (1,500)
• tonytonytee (1,200)
• wbradss (400)

… and a whole bunch of others. There are probably additional me-too posts coming in every hour.

So now I’m wondering whether DrRonPaul2012 is really the author of the subtitles of “Hitler Finds Out Scott Brown Massachusetts Senate Seat” or if he was also merely a re-poster who happened to get found by the right people.

Can anyone shed some light the true origins of this clip? (Not the TRUE origins … we know it’s from the movie “Downfall.” I mean the true origins of the more popular Coakley-Brown version.) And if DrRonPaul2012 is not the real subtitle author, does the real subtitle author have any copyright claims against him? Or does the fact that we’ve all be stealing from “fairly using” the original movie void any sort of authorship rights for the new subtitles we’ve added?

Some three-and-a-half hours later, I posted my creation:

I put a link to the video in my Facebook status update and in a tweet with the #MASen hashtag, and went to bed.

This morning I was very happy to see that a handful of people had already watched it. Some of my Facebook friends shared it, and some of their friends watched it, too. It wasn’t too long before the video had over 100 views. I was pretty psyched. People were paying attention.

Then around 1:00 this afternoon I saw myself mentioned in a tweet. It said “@universalhub Local playwright Dave Schrag’s video @dvschrag is a better take: http://bit.ly/7iOtjH.” OK, I thought, that’s good news. One of my friends is spreading the word. But then I thought … Wait a minute. A “better take” than what?

I looked at @universalhub’s earlier tweets and found “Hitler is stunned by Coakley’s defeat. http://bit.ly/6pRqzt.” Someone else had come up with exactly the same idea. And this other video was getting picked up all over the place, including big-name sites like Comedy Central. It was no contest. By early evening, my video had been watched almost 350 times, a number that I would have been awfully pleased with twelve hours prior. But this other video – which is funny but, IMHO, not as funny as mine – had almost 75,000 views. Seventy-five-THOUSAND views in a day. It was the 55th most viewed video today on ALL OF YOUTUBE!

So I ask those of you who know this stuff better than I, what did I do wrong? Why did this other guy go viral and not me? Did I fail to plant some seeds in the most obvious places? Or did this DrRonPaul2012 fellow have a huge head start on me? (He’s only got 61 YouTube subscribers, so I don’t think that alone could account for the rapid spread.)

Any ideas?

1. 28 Weeks Later
2. The Fugitive
3. Black Hawk Down
4. E.T.
5. Alien
6. Iron Man
7. The Fly
8. Minority Report
9. Saving Private Ryan

And, of course, The Office.

What’d I miss?

I saw last night’s CringeFest show as well and saw some good plays about bad plays, as well as a talented sound-effects comedian. The CringeFest runs through August 9, so check it out!

Double Yellow Lines: Both Solid
Two solid yellow lines prohibit vehicles moving in either direction from crossing the lines to pass another vehicle. You may not cross these lines unless turning left when it is safe to do so.
[Caption to illustration:] Do not cross a double yellow line unless turning left.

Massachusetts General Laws Chapter 90, Section 14 – the code I allegedly violated – has this and only this to say on the subject of left turns:

When approaching for a left turn on a two-way street, an operator shall do so in the lane of traffic to the right of and nearest to the center line of the roadway and the left turn shall be made by passing to the right of the center line of the entering way where it enters the intersection from his left. When turning to the left within an intersection or into an alley, private road or driveway an operator shall yield the right of way to any vehicle approaching from the opposite direction, including a bicycle on the right of the other approaching vehicles, which is within the intersection or so close thereto as to constitute an immediate hazard. It shall not be a defense for a motorist causing an accident with a bicycle that the bicycle was to the right of vehicular traffic. When approaching for a left turn on a one-way street, an operator shall do so in the lane of traffic nearest to the left-hand side of the roadway and as close as practicable to the left-hand curb or edge of roadway.

As I see it, the only way I can be said to have violated the law is under one of the following conditions:

1. The turn I made was a U-turn rather than a left turn, and U-turns are never permitted across double solid yellow lines.
2. The presence of the traffic island partly blocking the entrance to the driveway is by itself clear evidence that left turns and/or U-turns into the driveway are prohibited.

It is my contention that:

1. The turn was not a U-turn because by the time I started turning in a direction back toward my pre-turn position, I was already in the driveway. In other words, I made a left turn into the entrance of the driveway, then I bore further left after entering the driveway, and then followed the driveway around to the right.
2. Even if the turn was a U-turn, there is no absolute prohibition against U-turns that cross double solid yellow lines.
3. The traffic island’s purpose is to prevent cars that are leaving the driveway from turning left onto Arsenal Street, not to prevent cars Arsenal Street to enter the driveway when it is safe to do so. If left turns into the driveway are prohibited, there should be a “No Left Turn” sign either on Arsenal Street or on the traffic island itself.
4. Because all oncoming traffic was stopped at a light in front of me and I had a clear view of any potential obstacles, there was nothing inherently unsafe about the turn I made.

Here are some additional photos with close-ups of the traffic island:

(note how easily a car turning left can enter the driveway, and the absence of signage on the traffic island)

(a closer view of the driveway entrance)

(if no left turns are permitted, it could and should say so right here)

Some have pointed out that I could have made a left turn into the same parking log another half-block ahead, where there is a traffic light. True enough. But by that reasoning, virtually every U-turn should be prohibited and drivers should always proceed to the next intersection and make a series of left and right turns in order to change direction.

I’ll admit to being impatient, but I won’t admit to being unsafe or to violating the law.

Around ten after nine an unrobed man came in, positioned himself in front of the judge’s bench, introduced himself as Mr. Finucane, and explained what was going to happen this morning and what our rights for appeal were in the event that we did not agree with his decision. He swore us in en masse. Then the cases were heard. Mine was third, and up to that point the defendants were zero for two.

A police officer – not the one who had stopped me – read the charges against me. But I had come prepared. I explained that no law prohibited what I had done, and I told Mr. Finucane I had a video recreation of the events in question. He called me to his bench and had me play it, asking me to adjust the screen at one point so that the cop could see it. This is what they saw: (NOTE: This video was uploaded to MSN Soapbox, which is being shut down on August 31, 2009. After that date, the video will no longer be accessible)

As the video played, I pointed out that the traffic light ahead of me had stopped all oncoming traffic and so it was perfectly safe for me to make a left turn. I also pointed out that the entrance into the parking lot was only slightly obstructed and that no U-turn or other unusual maneuver was required for me to enter.

I informed Mr. Finucane that I also had still photographs if he wanted to see them. He declined. I stepped back. He asked no further questions but proceeded to announce the verdict: “I find you responsible …” I was stunned. I immediately announced my intention to appeal. As I signed the requisite form the cop said to me “You know, sir, there’s a traffic island there that’s intended to prevent you from making a left turn at that spot.” “But there’s no sign telling you that you can’t,” I said, “I know that know.” The cop laughed.

I had to pay $50.00 in cash to get the appeals process started. Yes, I’m paying $50.00 to appeal a $35.00 ticket. But the true cost of a moving violation is much larger than the face value, because it affects your auto and umbrella insurance premiums.

My appeal will be heard in six to eight weeks. Free the Watertown One!

Absurdist Humor: Where familiar themes are found in very unfamiliar situations.

• Ryan Landry, Joan, Joan, Joan and Hitler: Hitler conducts a group therapy session for three Joans: Crawford, Jett, and of Arc.
• Rosanna Yamagiwa Alfaro, The Second Coming: A pre/post-Apocalyptic tale featuring a half-avian, half-human protagonist.
• Rick Park, Please Report Any Suspicious Activity: A subway rider finds himself in the middle of a spat between two gay dolphins.
• Karmo Sanders, Nesting: A young couple engages in various domestic activities. The title gives us a clue that there is something different about this pair.
• George Spelvin, When No One Comes Calling: A knock on the door. Who is it? Why, a giant talking flower, of course.
• Dana Yeaton, Importees: Baby furniture comes with confusing instructions and an extra part.

Slice of Modern Life (Section A – Serious): Realistic portrayals of and commentaries on the world we live in.

• Laura Crook, But for the Grace of God: Three women at a playground discuss the challenges of motherhood.
• Lydia Diamond, A New Day: College students gather to watch the inauguration of President Obama.
• Vladimir Zelevinsky, St. Cloud: A young woman has a big announcement and a big decision to make.
• Kirsten Greenidge, Annie Desmond Gets a Tattoo: Teenage girls chat as one prepare for an encounter with a permanent marker.
• Tom Coash, Be the Hunter: Two hunting buddies grapple with their commitment to military service.
• Erin Striff, Close Your Eyes: A British tourist prepares to board a flight home with a dead baby hidden under her shirt.
• Dana Biscotti Myskowski, No Skating: A tough-love mother tries to get her son into rehab.
• Ed Bullins, Gone: Late night trouble in a local bar.
• Alan Brody, Abraham and Sarah: A look at the Abraham and Isaac story from Sarah’s perspective. (This was actually a slice of ancient life.)
• Danielle Slepian, Nine Lives: A man sees the vet about his gravely ill cat.
• Melinda Lopez, Sarasota: Two doctors discuss the personal and professional challenges of age.

Slice of Modern Life (Section B – Comical): Comedies of manners, generally set against an unlikely premise.

• Nina Mansfield, Missed Exit: A family is taken in unexpected directions by their car’s navigation system.
• George Sauer, Small Window: A couple of novices plan a restaurant scam.
• William Donnelly, Sugar Glider: A man describes his search for a missing beloved pet.
• Michael J. Grady, Sur la Maison: A jilted restaurant patron experiences the stages of grief.
• John Shea, Mikey D.: It’s a small world; even smaller when everyone has the same name.
• Christopher Lockheardt, Not Funny: A couple continues their petty bickering, even after she stabs him in the gut.

Plays about Playwrights: You don’t have to be a playwright or a theater major to understand these, but you’ll get a lot more of the jokes if you are.

• Robert Brustein, A Purge for a Poetaster: John Marston, having insulted Ben Jonson, seeks shelter in William Shakespeare’s house.
• Ronan Noone, Headbanger: Writer’s block causes Phil to bang his head against the wall. Over and over again.
• John Edward O’Brien, If at First …: In this coffee shop, everyone’s a character.
• William Orem, Trofimov, A Student: A college student bargains with his teacher to avoid failing his Intro to Chekhov class.
• Susan Thompson, Boundless as the Sea: Two Shakespearean actors who can really relate to the roles they’ve played.
• Jonathan Busch, Laying the Smack Down in Cambridge: A frustrated poet makes a Faustian bargain with a mysterious publisher. (OK, this one is about a poet, not a playwright, but close enough.)
• Jack Neary, Talkback: A playwright gets to speak with his audience, to his great regret.

The Poignant Reveal: In which tables are turned in a way that makes you go “Mmmmm.”

• Andrea Fleck Clardy, Safely Assumed: A middle-aged shoplifter shares her secrets with a juvenile offender while waiting for the probation officer.
• Julia Harmon Cain, Last Meal: The baking of an apple pie takes on added significance.
• Edmond Caldwell, The Liquidation of the Cohn Estate: A woman takes a special interest in the items at an estate sale.
• Jeanne Beckwith, The Great Mail Robbery: A young man has his own reasons for stealing a mail truck.
• Gary Garrison, The Sweep: Given a second chance at life, a man tells his friend what to do if he’s not so lucky the next time. (Note: this play really fits in a few different categories.)
• Michael Tooher, The Sentry: A TV news reporter interviews a soldier on a surprising mission.
• Regina Eliot-Ramsey, Family First: A local hero confides to his brother that he’s not looking forward to his moment in the spotlight.
• Holly L. Jensen, Class Act, Version 379: High school students reminisce about a shared experience.
• Israel Horovitz, What Strong Fences Make: At 6:00 am, an Israeli border guard has an unexpected visitor.

The Funny Reveal: In which tables are turned in a way that makes you go “Ha!”

• Scott Malia, The Interview: A young man gets more than he bargained for as he chats up his date’s mother.
• George Brant, Lockdown: A “where are they now” band gets reunited for another gig – by the Army.
• Marisa Smith, The Pre-Nup: A woman walks into a trap set by her dead husband.
• Peter M. Floyd, Perspective: A long-married couple have different takes on a line from a Woody Allen movie, among other things.

Brief Encounters: Where complete strangers (or strangers with a hidden connection) meet.

• Ken Urban, White People: Two very different characters strike up a conversation on a subway train.
• Scott McCrea, Her Eyes: A man becomes obsessed with a woman who has his wife’s eyes – literally.
• Toby Armour, Lifer: A cop on the eve of retirement has to evict a reluctant tenant.
• Patrick Gabridge, Recognition: A woman in town for a conference runs into another woman – one she was hoping never to meet.
• Stephen Faria, Inheriting Cleo: Escaping from his own relative’s funeral, a man connects with a mourner across the hall.
• Paul H. Goodwin, Gwen & Evelyn: A very ill man gets a new caretaker.

I thought there were some very good and some not-as-good entries in each category. That being said, it does seem that some categories were more in tune with my taste in ten-minute plays than others. The comedies – both the comic slices of life and the funny reveals – were the most accessible, whereas many of the serious slices of life and the poignant reveals seemed awfully talky. Although writing comedy is hard, it’s easier to get a quick laugh than a quick lump in the throat. There’s probably a reason why there’s no such thing as “sketch tragedy.” The absurdist plays were hit-and-miss. Some I got and enjoyed; some I thought were a jumbled mess. And the success of the brief encounters, in my mind, depended entirely on the playwrights’ and actors’ ability to create characters worth watching. The stories themselves were not the primary focus here. The plays about writers … well, it’s said that you should write what you know, and as a result there are a LOT of plays written about writers. So the material gets awfully familiar. On the other hand, there’s a lot to be mined from that particular vein.

So that was BTM XI. Time now for me to go write a play: A couple of neurotic writers have a chance encounter on a Ferris Wheel in Hell. Their banter reminds us of our own lives, but as it turns out ….